The miserable life

I had the worst gastric in my life that made me feel sick for two days long. I feel really bad not because of the pain, but to made the dad and mum worried when they see me sick. They must be worried when the kids are away from home who doesn't know how to take care of themselves. It reminds me one year back after spending ten days in the hospital, i promised to be a healthy girl, your healthy daughter.

And not yet, the worst part is when i'm trying hard in hiding away all the truth form them, which i think this is to be the best to them, and the truth is, i am sick and tired of doing this. I'm so helpless that no one will ever know what i'm going through. Sometimes, i just feel like my soul is just as weak as my body.

How i really wish i got you, not only as a lover but my best friend too, to listen to me when i'm weak, because i wish i can always tell you everything of mine.

But i'm all alone

i love u

Crying at the night, always my bad bad habit. I might be fragile sometimes, i know, but believe me, that i will be fine, because you will never see the me in the past, as i promise. And promise you this is to be the last time, because i am going to hide away all my love, and let everything end in tears.

Memories linger on, it's like a sweet yet sad love song. So allow me to feel your love, your heartbeats and your gentle kiss, once again in this night, that happen to the sweetest dream of mine.

Know that i am gonna love you,
in my special way.

I'm still lucky

Hours ago, i'm looking at my notes but my tears just falling down, like that. I lost my focus as i'm getting emotional, i put aside all the papers and by coincidence, i came across a blog of a girl, and this is a lil part of what she wrote:

“老公应该很怕吧，突然间撞向那么大架的罗里”
“老公应该很痛吧，眼睛流血了”
“老公应该很热吧，警察们把你丢在路边，太阳直接晒到你”
“老公不用怕，警察带你去医院吹冷气了”
今天，就是老公的受难日,他变成了我的回忆,他结束了这场生命.

( Hubby must be afraid, when you crashed into the lorry.
Hubby must be painful, as your eyes bleeding.
Hubby must be hot, that the police leave you at the roadside, exposed under the sun.
Hubby dun be afraid, the police taking you to the hospital.
Today, he become my memory, he ended his life. )

I cry even harder as i read through her entire blog, but i will never know the pain of a girlfriend suffer from the death of her love one. In that moment, i just told myself, that i'm oh so lucky, and i shouldn't be crying now. Instead, appreciate them, the love one, when you still able to hold them, talk to them, and love them. And it's never too late to say the words,
'i love you'.

People, please be grateful, for every breath u are taking in.

where are you?
i need you :(

My nightmare

My body is shivering, I cover myself under the blanket, and I couldn’t stop crying for ten minute as I’m woken up from a nightmare. I couldn’t remember when was the last time I’m having a nightmare, I mean a really frightening one, the terror just wouldn’t go away and I found myself hardly get back to sleep.


Its 4 in the morning, I seriously need some sleep but my mind doesn’t allow me, the shyt is just too much for my lil head and I’m weak at this moment. At one time, my heart can only fit one, or no one. I'm afraid in making up my mind, because just one wrong move is enough to make me regret for really long. I need a break, so that to clear my head and stay away from this mess, and listen to my heart, as it will bring me to where I wanna be.

all you need to do,
is whisper the three magic words,
& i'm yours.

Not a confession

Some beginnings start so quietly and you don't even notice they are happening.
"maybe we would not start something right now, but we will definitely create a memory".
As for me, that's nothing better than having you knowing you care.

并不是妥协，而却也是另一种幸福。
原来，你一直在乎，你懂得珍惜，所以，我更加幸福。



i'm ALL IN
- i <3 you, lwy. -

新年咯

新年新年, 又是新的一年,


接下来的日子, 要对自己说:


1. 对身边的人好一点, 因为你下辈子不一定能够再遇见他。
对自己好一点, 因为一辈子其实很短, 我知道我永远都值得更好的。


2. 与其沉溺在回不来的过去, 我选择相信下一个他会更爱我。
昨天虽然是美好的, 但我要用我的力量, 去创造那一个更美好的明天。


3. 笑一笑, 没什么大不了 =)




最后,

祝,

新年快乐,

也祝,

情人节快乐。

四年

一份双人套餐，

一部看不完的电影，

没有从前的惊喜，

也没有从前的感动。

并不是什么庆祝的日子，

只是纪念一起走过的第1462天。

你说过，

有些事，是不会改变的，

有些人，是无可取代的。

我说，

我没哭，只是回忆太感触，

我不哭，只是眼泪掉下了。

不能牵的手，

我学会微笑去祝福。